My life in the clouds.

Living in the clouds has its advantages. It’s still true. They have a majestic beauty and they create a soft film through which to see my surroundings. The clouds gather about me in the forms of loyal dogs, the adorable man on the reversed tricycle with the speaker overhead, affectionate children, delicious bread, the mountains in every view, the colorful streets, the Jesus statue parade, and multitudes of others.

However, living in the clouds has its disadvantages as well. When the clouds start to clear, the pain hidden among them becomes more visible.

Today, we had our weekly discussion with the director of our school. Our topic has been the 36 year armed conflict in Guatemala, which we are not far removed from as far as time is concerned. Today, he asked me to translate a story to the group from a book written in the 1980s. I had a hard time with the language as there were many words I didn’t understand. But I had a more difficult time with the content. It was another story of a village persecuted at the whim of a government in search of “communists” in order to satisfy the desire of the US CIA, foreign (American) companies and a few in power to eradicate supposed communists via unfair accusations, institutionalized slavery and eventual massacres.

We learned more of the story today. We learned of the role of the neopentecostal church and how they started churches and because they had money-- and with the assistance of the government-- they would give people food and necessities if the people handed over their guns—but only if they also converted to this church. The Catholic church at the time was considered to be radical and leftist by the government because they talked about freedom and equality and justice, but the neopentecostal church talked about how everything happens for a reason and we just need to accept our life circumstances. Two very different philosophies under the same faith heading.

I don’t think that I’m incredibly naïve, and I know these things happen all the time. I know that my government was involved in this whole situation in a VERY negative way, basically supporting the massacres in the name of anti-communism, and that my government and others everywhere are involved in many conflicts in various ways that I will never understand completely. I know that it is complex, and there are two sides to every story. But it doesn’t make it any less wrong. And just because civil wars and armed conflicts and tragedies are an everyday occurrence doesn’t mean that hearing about them shouldn’t break my heart.

Walking down the hill today, I began to step out of the clouds. As my tears threatened to choke me, all I could think of was this song:

Changes Come –by Over the Rhine

Changes come…turn my world around.
Changes come…turn my world around.

I have my father’s hand, I have my mother’s tongue
I look for redemption in everyone.
I wanna wear your ring, I have a song to sing
It aint over babe, in fact it’s just begun.

Changes come…turn my world around
Changes come…bring the whole thing down.

I wanna have our baby, somedays I think that maybe
This old world’s too messed up for any firstborn son

There is all this untouched beauty, the light the dark both running through me
Is there still redemption for anyone?

Changes come…turn my world around.
Changes come…bring the whole thing down.

Jesus come…turn our world around.
Jesus come…lay my burden down.
Jesus come…turn this world around.
Jesus come…bring the whole thing down.


If you've never heard the song, the live version is well worth a listen.